From the Cheap Seats-3/11/02

From the Cheap Seats-March 11, 2002

Hello all of you loyal readers of the Outside Influence. I am the alter ego known as Dan Glamour.

Wrestlemania XVIII is less than a week away and I will be in Toronto, Ontario, Canada for the greatest event in sports entertainment.

I'm not going to get to go to WWF Fan Axxess. What is up with that shit?!? That would have been a great thing to do. Oh well. If you get the opportunity to go to WWF Fan Axxess, then have fun.

On Friday March 22, 2002, I will be posting a bonus column that discusses my Wrestlemania XVIII trip. I will be giving you excerpts from my journal. I will also have some pictures from my trip as well.

I missed the first half hour of RAW, so I really can't comment on it.

Where was Bob Barker during the Stephanie/Triple H/Lucy segment, to remind us to have our pets spaded and neutered? How come Jerry Lawler didn't yell "puppies" during
this segment either?

I was really hoping for DDP/Christian vs. Chuck/Billy for the Tag Team Titles tonight.

I had a weird thought. If Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw ever fought Rikishi, would he brand Rikishi's ass when he wasn't looking?

I want to call an emergency "bored" meeting. Watching anyone named McMahon bitch and moan means that it is time for a bathroom break. Especially Linda McMahon.

I don't know why but for some reason, I don't think I would ever play a game of golf with a Klingon. I would be worried about kicking its ass and then having his buddies vaporize my ass. Sounds like a bunch of soccer fans.

An incite was given to me. Why is it that every time that every time someone has a "mystery" tag team partner that the Big Show is always that guy?

DAMN IT!!! WE DON'T GET UPN IN WHEELING, WEST VIRGINIA!!! THANK GOD I AM GRADUATING IN MAY AND RETURNING TO CIVILIZATION!!!

Now if you didn't think I was "gay" before, you probably will now. I actually like Chuck and Billy's entrance music. And no I'm not gay.

There is no such thing as a happy tantrum. Thank God that Christian finally got a win. Christian is such a great heel but the WWF has to do stupid stuff like having wrestlers throw tantrums. Why not have the Big Show do something like that? Now that might be interesting. I should really stop typing right now but I am ignoring Vince McMahon.

SHUT UP VINCE!!! SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!! YOU TOO LINDA!!! AND YOU TOO CARROT TOP!!!

Lita's clothes glow in the dark. That means that I will be able to see when I walk around my room in the dark. ;) Jazz's clothes will be staying on though. In fact Jazz will never be anywhere near my bedroom.

Cigarette commercials suck!!! Tobacco Commercials are Whacko!!!

There was a South Park commercial during RAW. Guess what? Wheeling, West Virginia does not get Comedy Central either.

Man when someone upsets me I say, "why don't you just kick my dog?" Now granted I don't have a dog and I'm allergic to them but it's just an expression. I should change it to "why don't you just run over my car?"

Now I have to ask, do terrorists get money from the sale of all drugs? I mean I am going to stop by Tylenol if that's true.

I found it funny when Chris Jericho hit Triple H in the knee when RAW came back from commercial. I just hope that it doesn't happen to me when I am walking to class one day. That would suck and not be funny. Again, I am trying to ignore the WWF emergency board meeting. So please excuse my incoherent ramblings.

The crowd was really hot for this match. I never thought and I'm sure a lot of you never thought that The Rock and Stonecold Steve Austin vs. Hulk Hogan, Scott Hall, and Kevin Nash aka The NWO?

Kevin Nash must be pretty pissed off. He doesn't even have a match for Wrestlemania. And after watching that ending to the "historical" match, Hulk Hogan is going to get his ass kicked at Wrestlemania.

For some reason I really didn't care for this episode of RAW so I give it "If this keeps up, I'm never going to be allowed to watch wrestling at Mike's House again. The whole emergency board meeting segment so horrible. What is the point of Vince McMahon having sole control of the WWF until after Wrestlemania? Why would you injure Triple H and his dog before the Undisputed Title match? Wrestlers are healing way too fast, even if the stuff is staged. The "historical" (sarcasm) match at the end of RAW didn't live up to the hype either. I mean it wasn't horrible but it could have been better.

Now on to my Wrestlemania XVIII predictions. My prediction is....THAT I'M GOING TO BE THERE!!! GOODNIGHT!!! SEE YOU NEXT TUESDAY!!!

Peace Out,
Dan Glamour

[Outside Influence]

© 2002 The Outside Influence
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